Mitch Hedberg « musings of an overactive mind

Posts Tagged ‘Mitch Hedberg’

Demetri Martin Quotes

01Oct06

Slacking off on original material, propagating the hilarity of others instead. Enjoy!

“I wonder what the most intelligent thing ever said was that started with the word ‘dude.’ ‘Dude, these are isotopes.’ ‘Dude, we removed your kidney. You’re gonna be fine.’ ‘Dude, I am so stoked to win this Nobel Prize. I just wanna thank [...]

Filed under: Quotes | 185 Comments
Tags: amusement, Comedy, Demetri Martin, Humor, Humour, joy, Mitch Hedberg, Quotes

Jack Handey Quotes

24Sep06

To me, it’s always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, ‘Hey, can you give me a hand?,’ you can say, ‘Sorry, got these sacks.’
We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can’t scoff at them personally, to their [...]

Filed under: Quotes | 9 Comments
Tags: amusement, boredom repellant, Comedy, Demetri Martin, Humor, Humour, Jack Handey, joy, Mitch Hedberg

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The hitherto unspoken of agreement will now be made blatantly clear: here's the deal. Thousands of people read my posts (two people once stumbled upon my blog by searching for "scrotum pimple" - sometimes I still think about them, and their scrotum pimples, and the total irrelevance that they would have encountered in my writings), still, less than 1% bother to comment. I must admit that I do this myself, whether it be a post I like or don't like - unless it's incredibly important to me I won't bother. Here's the thing though - I intend on being a writer; and for that to happen I need feedback, whether positive, negative, or neutral "it didn't affect me" feedback. Otherwise I won't know whether the masses are ready for what I have to say or if they were thoroughly offended by my arrogance, nor will I know whether my readers find it relevant, interesting, thought-provoking - or irrelevant, pompous, with too many long sentences (like this one) and huge words they don't understand. So the deal is this; and I've seen many blogs with this feature. I add a "recent comments" widget, below. 5 of the most recent commentators get their comment and avatar plastered over every single page in my blog - right beneath this; consequently, an average of a thousand people per day will be exposed to your blog, increasing your traffic immensely. I'm not so worried about traffic - I just want honest, brutal, if necessary, feedback from unbiased, anonymous individuals. I'm not getting enough of it to make any conclusions; so I'm instigating this co-beneficial widget to give readers intensive to overcome their 'comment-posting-laziness' - a common affliction affecting up to 100% of those suffering from it.Take it or leave it. * Demetri martin comments which repeat jokes already on the page or inform people of your crush on him and how cute you find him aren't included. Stop it.
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Posts Tagged ‘Mitch Hedberg’

Demetri Martin Quotes

Jack Handey Quotes

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